Proverbs on pro-active friendship

A few blocks away from our home is one with, well, unique “landscaping.” An older gentleman, who lives alone and is frequently seen walking about town, has filled his front yard with wooden women he carves and paints. Over the years we’ve watched his collection grow. They’re amusing to passers-by, but every time I see them, I think of this truth: They can’t love him back.

I’m reminded of one of the top pop songs from the year I graduated from high school (1965).  It began: “What the world needs now is love, sweet love”—something, it continued, that the world had too little of.  I wasn’t too captivated by the song, relegating it to the likes of Elvis and “Love Me Tender, Love Me Sweet” and similar soupy lyrics.  Sorry Elvis, but while you pleaded “never let me go,” I was able to “let go” of platitudes about “luv.” More important to me was finding true friends--that network of supportive people who are there both when life is celebratory and life is hard.  I suspect that I’m not alone in this, as my fifth most-accessed blog (still getting “visits”) discussed what goes into a growing friendship.  You can access it here:   http://jeannezornes.blogspot.com/2011/01/give-and-take-guide-to-friendship.html

My current friendships have taken years to grow, but I am blessed by friends of several degrees of affinity:  casual, comfortable, and close. I thought of that the other night at a church function. I “knew” many there from our years of shared connection, and it was easy to greet them with a casual hug and ask how they’re doing. But there are only a select few whom I feel okay about calling and saying, “I’m really hurting over this situation and need godly wisdom. Please pray.” I need the support of godly friends:

“The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray” (Proverbs 12:26).

What about virtual friends? Yes, social media can connect people with far less effort than mailing a letter or calling. But sometimes the virtual representation can easily hide the true "us." Plus, nothing can replace a real live person who can hug you, cry with you, and admonish you toward godly choices. With a face-to-face encounter, you don't easily "click out" of real communication from the heart.

But let’s come back to the positives! The blessings of seeking to be a nurturing a “friend-friendly” person are many. Proverbs 22:11 says, “One who loves a pure heart and who speaks with grace will have the king for a friend.” The greatest “king” to have as a Friend, of course, is Jesus. Other religions mandate ritual ablutions or “prayer” practices, sacrifices or pilgrimages. Jesus said simply, “You are my friends if you do what I command” (John 15:14). And His command? “Love each other” (v. 17).