ASSIGNED SEATS

The grandson "side" of the table--three in a
row--Jimmy's with the "booster pad"

He turns the big “eight” in September—James (JimmyJohn, our pet family name for him), the youngest of my grands. With two just-older brothers, he's always wanted to be “just bigger” than the calendar allowed. It was a major moment when he outgrew the high chair and was allowed to eat right at the “big people” table. But that presented a problem. His chin lined up vertically with the tabletop, and he needed a “lift.” Enter a substantial foam “seat lift” from a yard sale, secured with a bungee cord. And thus has JimmyJohn felt like he's part of the “boy tribe” of my son's family.

The family meal setup in my compact kitchen/eating area, however, pales next to the elegance of what various artists have imagined might be Heaven's banquet hall (if we could even dare to suggest an earthly convention for Heaven's mysteries!). An internet search will bring up luxurious table settings with multiple goblets, and royal-worthy cutlery, gorgeous plates, and the soft lighting of candelabra. (This is one-- https://www.pinterest.com/pin/home-decor--33495590955158074/ – or search others with key words “dinner in heaven images.”) The truth is that we don't know. But if--BIG IF-- our earthly reality of gathering to eat and converse has a future heavenly "match," I'd say it's a good thing to keep having! 

Granted, it's chaotic when my son's family comes over. Because spills are inevitable on the “boy side” of the table, I have plastic place-mats featuring Washington state landmarks at the boys' places. That cuts down how often I need to wash the tablecloth, which covers a refurbished antique oak pedestal table. But we are together!

I realize that in many households, sitting around a communal table has become a thing of the past. Instead, dinners are placed on trays and the family “sits around” the television. Since dinnertime programming is typically news stations, I question (in jest, but partly in truth) if that habit might encourage indigestion. The worst and most vile seem to get the headlines around the dinner-hour news shows. And those who try to talk over the chatter of the news anchor are apt to get shushed by those wanting to keep on the keen edge of news events. On the other side of the spectrum, there are many who eat alone, quiet or with TV chatter in the background.

I prefer the “connection meals,” the ones where families ask each other, “Tell me about your day.” Or the celebration meals (like Thanksgiving, where many begin, “Tell one thing you're thankful for”). And such conversation should include the kids who are old enough to talk. Or who have graduated from the “high chair” to a regular adult chair (though helped with a thick cushion).

We need more at the table than “pass the peas” or “I want another roll.” In our fast-paced world, the table is the platform for talking to each other. I hope my grandsons see it that way, especially now that “younger brother” has a seat “up with” his older siblings. Someday, I realize, he won't need that booster. I'll put it away for possible “company need.”

In the meantime, let the conversation flow. More than, “Please pass the rolls.” “I want some more chicken casserole.” (Grandma: “Magic word?” Grandson, “PLEEAASSEE.”) Then, the second serving for a growing boy, soon to outgrow the booster seat. When they leave my home after a meal, and cleanup is done, sometimes I think...someday....how majestic, how sacred, how joyful, will be Heaven's "marriage supper of The Lamb"!